


the past can't haunt me if i don't let it (live and learn and never forget it)

by EastOfEll



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-06
Updated: 2017-08-06
Packaged: 2018-12-11 20:05:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11721597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EastOfEll/pseuds/EastOfEll
Summary: maggie runs into her father.basically a fix it fic of 3x03 before it even airs.





	the past can't haunt me if i don't let it (live and learn and never forget it)

**Author's Note:**

> welcome to the Author Notes. i'd like to give a warning in which the d slur is said twice, and it's a little near the middle. i'd also like to say that if you've been keeping up with spoilers, i've ignored the whole "wall" plot device that's seeming to pop up, because the best fix it solution for that ugly mess is that it doesn't exist in the first place.
> 
> regardless, i hope you enjoy! there's some sanvers fluff at the end too :') love those lesbians
> 
> sapphics on tumblr/nblesian on twitter if you ever wanna chat

Maggie is 14 years old when her father kicks her out, and it takes another 14 for him to reappear. 

 

She’s going to the store for a few groceries; her and Alex have finally moved in together, and the wedding ring on her finger is still new enough that she feels the weight of it. It’s a good weight, though― a reminder that someone out there is willing to go through thick and thin for her. Alex, who, unlike what most people think, is the exact opposite of a morning person, and is snoozing under the covers. Not that it matters too much, anyway. After being near Kara for so long, Alex has the palate of a teenage boy, and Maggie designated herself as the main grocery shopper.

 

(She gives a little leeway, buying a little bit of junk food. But she also gets vegetables.)

 

Maggie doesn’t realize it’s him at first. She barely sees him, eating a sandwich on the patio of a small, hole-in-the-wall deli, when she hears a startled, “Maggie?”

 

She turns around and comes face to face with a man she had wished to have never seen again. She stops, looking at him. He’s gained more wrinkles and white in his beard since she last saw him, but,  _ God _ , it’s him―

 

“Dad?” 

 

“You live in National City,” he states.

 

“I do.”  _ Not that you would’ve visited if you had known. _

 

“Do you want to… take this somewhere more private? A walk in the park?”

 

“There’s a nature trail a few blocks from here.” Maggie hides her grimace. Her and her father used to walk in the park to talk about the happenings before, well, he disowned her. He throws away his trash, and Maggie leads him.

 

Halfway there, Maggie pauses her walk and holds up a finger, saying, “I need to throw a quick text,” and if her father thinks it’s rude, she doesn’t care. She texts Alex she’ll be a little late with groceries― she ran into someone, but it won’t be long. The details are spared.

 

There’s an inquisitive look in his eye. “To whom?”

 

“My fiancée,” she answers bluntly, and when she sees his eyes warm, she knows she’ll be clarifying the extra letter.

 

“What’s his name?”

 

“Her name is Alex,” Maggie says, and her father’s eyes grow cold.

 

“So,” he says, “you still think you can get away with that.”

 

“Get away with what?” Maggie stops, putting her phone in her pocket and crossing her arms, looking at him. They continue walking, the park looming ahead of them.

 

“Being homosexual.” Maggie feels the chills start up her spine. “You know, when I disciplined you for being this way all those years ago, I thought you would’ve  _ changed _ ―”

 

“You  _ disciplined  _ me?” Maggie stares at him in shock. “That’s what you think kicking me out is? You left me defenseless. If Aunt Rosalina hadn’t taken me in, I would’ve been homeless, just like all the other gay kids in this country. That isn’t discipline, that’s child neglect.”

 

He huffs, starting to walk away, when Maggie walks after him and yells, “So you’re going to walk? After all this time?”

 

“When you’re still the same as you were?” He turns around, throwing his hands up. “Yes, I am!”

 

Maggie feels herself involuntarily flinch.  _ Damn… even now _ . She tries to keep calm. “I’m not the same.”

 

“You’re still one of those  _ dykes,  _ Maggie. You’re exactly the same.” He spits it out, and Maggie breathes in.

 

“Yeah.” She stops. By this time, they’ve reached the beginning of the nature trail. “I am. I’m a dyke. A lesbian. A homosexual. Whatever you want to call it. But I’ve learned to love myself. That girl you kicked out didn’t. She was ashamed of liking girls. She didn’t join any sports at the new school she went to because she was afraid of being pummeled if she looked the wrong way in the locker rooms. She stayed alone because she was afraid of letting people in. Because who could love her if even her own parents didn’t?” She feels tears prick at the corner of her eyes. “But it’s possible. I’ve found someone who loves me just as much as I love her. We’re lesbians, and we’re  _ happy _ . I don’t give a fuck if you never want to see me again after this, because I don’t need you anymore. I’ve gone half of my life without you. I’ve made something of myself. I’ve found my own family― one that loves me and encourages me to be who I am.”

 

“That’s the worst part,” her father says. “You think it’s okay.”

 

“Of course it’s okay. I’m going to get married, and it’s going to be to the love of my life― who is a  _ woman _ , by the way, in case you’ve forgotten― and someone else is going to walk me down the aisle,” she laughs at this, a combination of relief and regret, “and you know what? It’s going to be okay. It always will be.”

 

“No it isn’t!” He’s yelling now,  _ yelling now _ . “Can’t you see what you’re doing? You could come home. You could renounce your sin and the family could be restored again. And who knows? Maybe you could find a nice guy…”

 

“Bullshit!” Maggie says. “This is who I  _ am _ . Nothing you can do is going to change that.”

 

He sighs in defeat. “Fine. Maybe I can… look past all of this, and we could build a relationship. I’m willing to do that. I’m willing to do that for you.”

 

“I don’t want one.”

 

Her father’s eyebrows raise in shock, and his eyes convey a flicker of hurt. “Seriously? I’m willing to put a part of you behind me but you can’t put behind the past? I’m your father!”

 

“No you’re not.” If looks could kill, if Maggie had Kara’s laser eyes, her father would be a scorch mark on the sidewalk. “A parent’s job is to love and nurture their children. You stopped doing that the second you hit me with your belt before kicking me out into the cold February night. I still have that mark, you know? On my arm? There’s a scar from where the buckle made me bleed.” She huffs. “Yeah, you stopped being my father the day you disowned me. It wasn’t my choice.”

 

“I’m your  _ blood _ , Maggie, your family. That doesn’t matter to you?”

 

“You’re the one who abandoned me. And I think that’s all I need to say on that,  _ Dad _ .” The title is spoken with venom. With this, Maggie’s phone rings. “Hello?”

 

“Hey, babe.” Alex’s voice crackles through the speaker. “I forgot to tell you, but can you get some yogurt covered pretzels? Chocolate. And you better not get them lowfat.”

 

“Is that her?” he asks.

 

“Yes,” Maggie says, “it’s her.”

 

“Oh, are you still with the person you ran into? I’m sorry, I can hang up―”

 

“No, I was just about done with him anyways. I’ve said what I wanted to say.”

 

A look of irritation crosses Maggie’s father’s face. “But  _ I  _ wasn’t done―”

 

“You don’t get the privilege of being done,” Maggie says. “I’m going to leave now, and you’re not going to follow me. Not only am I a cop too, now, but my fiancée is a federal agent with connections to Supergirl. If I never see you again, it’ll have been too soon. So with that… goodbye. And I hope you live the rest of your life thinking about what could have been.”

 

She walks away from her past until she’s out of earshot, before continuing. “Sorry about that, Alex. What was it you wanted to say?”

 

――――― 

 

When Maggie comes home, several bags in hand, Alex takes a few before asking, “Who was that? You sounded pretty threatening over the phone.”

 

“My dad,” Maggie states, and Alex quickly sets her load down on the counter before coming over and rubbing Maggie’s shoulders.

 

“Your  _ father _ ? Why didn’t you tell me?” Alex frowns. “I could’ve helped.”

 

“Punching him in the face doesn’t really count as help.” Alex rolls her eyes at this, but grins. “Besides, I wanted to fight my own demons, just this once.”

 

“You’re not alone.” Alex takes Maggie’s hand and squeezes it.

 

“I know.” Maggie smiles. “Which is why I wanted to ask… wanna play hooky and watch cheesy movies all day? I need the emotional support.”

 

Alex’s eyes soften. “Anything for you. I love you,” she says, the words making Maggie’s heart constrict in the warmest way, and Alex’s grin turns playful, “and you better not forget that.”

 

“Or what?” Maggie plays along.

 

“Or I’ll love you  _ harder _ .” Alex takes Maggie in and hugs her, Maggie’s shorter frame giving her the ability to prop her chin on the crown of Maggie’s head, their hands still intertwined. “Even though it kinda seems impossible at this moment, but I’ll figure out a way… Really, though, that must have been extremely taxing on your mental energy. If you want to rant, cry, drunkenly call Winn and tell him his clashing bow ties and shirts make him look lame, I’m up for anything.”

 

Maggie laughs. “I’m pretty sure you self-projected on that last one there. I’m still kind of in shock right now with everything that happened, but I know when it all comes crashing down, I want you to be there beside me.”

 

“Until death do us part,” Alex says, and her fingertips ghost over the ring sitting on Maggie’s finger. 

 

A reminder through the thick and thin, Maggie remembers, and she sighs contently.


End file.
